Poem “Smiles” by Tiamat

Every morning
We exchange smiles
Me and my mom.
Her smile says
“I’m fine”
My smile says
“I’m happy, you are fine.”
The reality begs to differ.
Behind her every morning smile.
There is an immense pain.
She has been hiding for a year and a half now.
Me and my smile knows
She isn’t fine.
It knows
She is fighting.
She is suffering.
She is in agony.
She is in distress.
She is in PAIN.
Me and my smile know.

Our smiles know it all.
We both know it all.
Still, smiles are where we have found our solace.

Every morning,
When I get up.
The first thing I do is to go to her room.
Just to see her sitting there and smiling.
Knowing the smile isn’t real.
Knowing the pain behind that smile is immense.
Knowing that she would never express her anguish.
Knowing that she would never show her sufferings.

Every morning
I gather the courage
To see her and smile at her.
For all that she has done for me in the last 19 years, no ordinary being can do.

And I know my smile
Wouldn’t heal her
Wouldn’t give her relief
Wouldn’t lessen her sufferings
But all I know is

My smile
Would give her
And power
To stand again
Up against
This cruel world.

My smile would give her,
What my words cannot.
My smile would do,
What I cannot.

P.S: I wish my smile could heal her.

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